Un-disappeared

So, I was all gung-ho about how I was gonna write in this all the time, but yeah, then I disappeared. I've pretty much been curled in a ball of self pity and boredom, trying to ignore the phone when it rings, because it's just another bill collector, and I don't have any money to give them, because I gave it all to the bill collectors who called yesterday. I did knit a scarf for a friend of mine, and finish sewing a cosplay, which I now have to cover in handpainted white dots....hooray. I also found a bag of fabric I bought ages ago for a cosplay for a friend of mine, who will be coming to Anime Boston with me in April. So at least I have something to work on. Good thing I stocked up while I was working... Anyway, I'm gonna try to not be so lazy and post, and comment on others.

75 and Sunny

Well, this is an improvement! The sun is out, the wind is warm, the water is teal and beautiful. We went for a long walk on the beach, found some shells, saw a few dead jellyfish (ew!), splashed around in the water, then went to an open-air mall (I bought my brother a t-shirt from the Bubba Gump Shrimp Company that says "My mama says I'm special") More walking on the beach (I don't think it's possible for me to get sick of it). Now we're gonna shower and soak in the hottub, ahhhh.

change of pace

Got to Florida in one piece. My first flight was over 2 hours late, but I still managed to get down here! My friends parents are letting me use their condo on Daytona, it's beautiful. The Atlantic is right outside my window. Pelicans have been flying by close enough to reach out and touch them, and I saw a dolphin in the water while I was sitting on the balcony. I've never seen a horizon like this either, unbroken as far as you can see. I cried a little when I saw it. Today my friend is going to show me the sights around Daytona, and we might go to St. Augustine tonight to go on a ghost tour. Ooooo, spooky!

Trying to be thankful....

Happy Turkey Day, y'all. I know I have a lot to be thankful for, but right now I feel like such a depressed pile of crap, it's hard to really feel it. Anyway, I'm going to my nanny's house in a bit, and I've always been convinced she has some kind of magic turkey tree in her back yard. My nanny is such a good cook (it must skip a generation, cause my mom and aunt can't cook for shit). Thanksgiving is my favorite meal of the year. I also have a loaf of pumpkin bread my best friend baked for my birthday, with banana and chocolate chips (did I mention yesterday was my birthday? Yeah, good times.). I didn't even know he could bake.
So, I'm going to try to force myself to list some stuff I'm grateful for, maybe I'll feel a bit better.
-My health has improved lately. I spent a lot of this year being sick, and I seem to be getting a lot better.
-My family is healthy. My mom was very, very sick for quite a while, she was diagnosed with Celiac's disease. She hasn't had any gluten for over a year, and she's lost over 45 pounds, she had sores all over her legs and arms, which are now healed (but left many scars, I told her they give her character). She was anemic, and now her blood is settling down, she had a heavy flowing period for over 2 months straight, but now she's on a normal 28 day cycle.
-My best friends M and K. I've known both of them for over 15 years, and we're as close as ever.
-I have a roof over my head, and clothes on my back. Granted, the roof may cave in at any moment, but it's there for now.
-I have colleagues who care about me, and who are helping me get back to work ASAP. It's good to know you're good enough at your job that people actively seek you out to work for them.
Well, that's all I can think of for now, I have to shower and get ready to stuff myself full of delicious Nanny-turkey.

So screwed.

So...today was my last day at work. I cried. My boss cried. The other inspectors cried. They cried manly tears, of course (I'm the only female in my sausagefest office). And on my ride home, my brother called me to let me know he'd been fired. So, now I'm pretty sure we're fucking screwed. And remember how I said I was his keeper? Well, guess who's franticly searching online help wanted ads, and guess who's watching some stupid show on Animal Planet? I'll give you a hint. There are no fucking tigers on the other tab in browser right now.

EDIT: The biggest reason that I cried my head off is because my mentor, who taught me everything I know about inspection, and has been my friend for 5 years is retiring after this job. I miss him already.

Surviving the winter

Surviving the winter isn't as commonplace as it used to be. It used to be for farmers and pioneers. Now it's for carnys and construction workers. I'm one of the latter, a highway construction inspector (specializing in environmental issues and erosion control). I lucked out last winter, the project I was on was 2 years long, and my bosses at the Department of Transportation didn't want me to find another job and ditch them, so they kept me on over the winter of 2009/2010. But the job is over now, I finished my last bit of paperwork today, and tomorrow will be my last day on the payroll. I'm starting my long winter break pleasantly enough, I'll be spending a week in Florida visiting my best friend, who I haven't seen since June, when she moved down south. It's just cold enough here that 80 degrees and sunny sounds like heaven.
When I get back on Dec 3, I'll be jobless, and mostly penniless. I try to save up a nice little nest egg over the summer, to ease the sudden 50% cut in income. But this year was one of 'those' years. I had to replace all 4 bearings on my car. Twice. My mom moved out, and I suddenly became my brother's keeper. My brother who is 2 years older than me. A tree fell on our house, punching 3 big holes through the roof. I crashed my car. I got bit by a spider, which went septic in about 36 hours and caused me to miss over 3 weeks of work. Yeah, one of 'those' years. And it ate up my savings. Where I normally go into winter with 6 or 7 thousand dollars, I have a paltry $300 in my savings account.
I wish I could go right back to work, but the chances of me finding a construction job in December are slim to none. I still send my resume off to every consultant firm I can find on the internet, but asphalt season ends November 22, and there's not a whole lot going on beside that. But if I'm frugal, and very, very careful, I should be able to squeak by.
So, now I have to entertain myself. I do a lot of crafts, mostly knitting and crocheting, and since I'm a bit of a yarn packrat, I have lots of materials to work with. I also want to improve my health a little. I'm carrying around a lot of extra weight, and I smoke on top of it. I quit cold turkey for over a month this summer, but everyone, and I mean EVERYONE on my jobsite smokes, and after a month of watching hundreds of cigarettes be smoked by someone else, I caved. I want to try again, I'm hoping that not having to watch dozens of other people smoke, I can make it this time. As for the weight, I have a simple goal. I bought a Bodyline skirt, size 2xl, and it's about 2 inches too small in the waist. I want that sucker to fit. Fitting into a 2xl may not sound like much of a goal, but a Japanese 2xl is quite a bit smaller than an American 2xl. I have a treadmill. I have time. I'm going to make myself have the inclination.